If the word "recognition" makes you cringe a little - like it's something from a mandatory company meeting - you're not alone.

But recognition isn't about corporate programs or employee-of-the-month plaques. It's about genuine appreciation. And that change in mindset... changes everything.

Most people go through their careers without hearing what they're actually good at. Not from their manager, not from their peers, not even from themselves. We may think it, but we don't say it. And when you're leading people, bringing that to your team - actually pausing to say what you see - can completely change how they show up at work, and their life outside of it.

The Three-Step Exercise

Here are the three steps I walk you through in the video. And yes, I'm serious: actually do this. 

Step 1: Recognition for Yourself

Start with you. I know - it sounds corny, 100%. But ask yourself the question: What makes me really good at my job?

Pause to gauge your initial reaction. Do you pause to think? Make a face? Start talking about other people instead of yourself? ("Well, I really care about people...")

That's normal. Most of us struggle with this, or even are better at spotting what's wrong than naming what's right - especially about ourselves. But if you're going to ask your team what they do well, you need to know what you actually see in yourself.

Write it down. You don't have to share it with anyone. This is just for you.

Step 2: Reach Out to Someone from Your Past

Now think about someone you've known in your career who's really great at what they do. Someone you could actually depend on - even if it's someone you worked with many years ago.

Now - and this is the part that I know feels uncomfortable - reach out to them.

It doesn't matter if you have their email, number or LinkedIn. Find them. And tell them something specific they did that made an impact.

You may think, "If I actually send this random message about why I appreciate them, they're going to think I must be in urgent trouble and this is my secret message to get them to help." And you may be right.

Here's how to frame it so it doesn't: "I was watching a video and it said to think about one person from your career who really stood out - and you're the one I thought of. I wanted to reach out because [specific thing(s) they did] really made a difference, and I still think about it to this day."

When they get that message, they're not thinking, "Oh, they're only doing this because a video told them to." They're thinking, "Out of everyone they've worked with, I'm the person they remembered?" And that has a real impact.

You might truly feel uncomfortable for a few seconds - maybe even right after you hit send. But I promise you: that's a message people don't forget. It matters for minutes and days and years. 

Step 3: Recognize Someone on Your Team Right Now

Now, do it for someone you're working with currently. Not necessarily the biggest impact of your career - but someone who did something that stood out - someone you realize, after reading this, you should actually tell them.

Maybe they're always caring in how they message people. Maybe when you made a mistake, they asked questions instead of throwing you under the bus. Maybe they just did something thoughtful that you noticed but never named.

The formula is simple: "You did a really great job at X, and here's why it made a difference because Y."

It doesn't have to be the huge moments. You don't have to wait for a year-end performance review. Just build the habit of seeing people and telling them what you see.

What This Actually Does

Here's what matters: recognition - genuine, specific appreciation - is critical infrastructure at work. It's not the "soft stuff." It's what makes everything else work.

When people feel actually seen, they're more engaged, they stay longer, they bring better work. They're also more likely to listen when you need to give tough feedback or talk about accountability. Trust is built in the small moments when someone says, "I noticed that. And it mattered."

And the ripple goes further than you think. It affects not just how they show up at work, but how they show up in the rest of their life.

Can't Easily Name What You're Good At?

That's exactly what the bonus tip in this week's email is for. I'll walk you through how to ask for feedback about yourself - and yes, even when it feels awkward. Sign up for the Manager Method Minute newsletter here.

Ready to build these habits in your team?

If you're an individual manager looking to develop these skills: Check out Manager 101 — our foundational course teaches you how to lead with clarity, build trust, and actually see the people on your team.

If you're an HR leader or organization ready to shift how managers show up: Set up a call to learn more. Our programs teach managers the practical and emotional skills they need - and recognition is where it starts.